I have laid low at work since coming back. (on a side note I checked the grammar on that and the correct usage is “I have lain low”….although that sounds a little pedantic to me).

I am at a low point for sure. 4 of my coworkers have left in the last few weeks (the 4 I liked the best), and our busy season at work is nearing an end so there isn’t much to do…which is boring. Also, there is no tennis right now to distract me and get me exercise, which I need to stay sane. Then there is just general life stuff which takes up the majority of my brain cycles, and never seems to get anywhere….which takes up more brain cycles getting frustrated with that.

I have been writing a whole lot in my personal journal, which is never a good sign. I haven’t written this much in years. I don’t find it nearly as cathartic as I used to. I used to get really excited when I had something to write….now it just makes my hand tired. Typing is much better.

I guess when I was younger I used to solve things when I thought. Now I just get frustrated over what I cannot control. Maybe I should start meditating?

My mom came down over the weekend. It was really nice to see her. She needed a break anyway. We went to go look at houses for me for a while on Saturday because I knew she liked that. (I am not nearly as excited about getting a house for me as she is.) She liked all the houses that cost too much money. I did too.

I’ve been playing the guitar alot lately too. That is an exercies substitute I think, since I also find that very soothing. I’ve been going to sleep earlier too…that usually helps, but I still have really dark circles under my eyes. I’m having a repeating dream these days too. Its really weird.

I am rambling aren’t I? Oh well….I think I’ll watch TV.

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